so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
