jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Randomize
