Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
you win again, gameday.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize