put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
