are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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