8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
So vagazzling was a success
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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