So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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