nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
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