I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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