yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
