No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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