Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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