I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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