Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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