ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
they need to just BURY HIM!
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
