i just made my gag reflex go away.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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