We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize