Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I want her autograph on my taint
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
