I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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