I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
