dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
