"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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