I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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