ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
