i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
