I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize