Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Randomize
