hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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