i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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