The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
