Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
