I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
