something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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