ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize
