Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
