it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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