what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
