3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
