Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
there is glitter all over my balls
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
