i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
