yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
