He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Ambien. No doubt about it.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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