I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
