just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
