wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
i drank out of a bidet.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
