dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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