I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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