Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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