I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize