Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
